One afternoon, I opened my smartphone and found a Line message from someone who had never messaged me before.
“Professor, I have something to consult with you. My niece is pregnant… but we are not ready. I used to be your student.” I replied that I was happy to help and asked about the pregnancy’s duration. The response was 12 weeks, so I suggested bringing the niece to see me at the hospital…
Two days later, the nurse who had messaged me came to meet at the youth clinic. Generally, according to the clinic’s procedure, when someone faces an unplanned pregnancy, they must receive counseling on their options first. If they choose to terminate the pregnancy, the nurse will check the indications for termination and assess mental health. After that, they are referred to a doctor to consider signing approval for the termination.
Upon meeting, the nurse introduced herself as the aunt of the person seeking advice for the unplanned pregnancy, who was her niece. She is the head nurse of a community hospital in another province, over 300 kilometers away. She made the effort to see me because her 23-year-old niece became pregnant by a driver working with her family’s business. This man deceived her niece, claiming he would love and take responsibility for the pregnancy even though they were not married. However, the head nurse discovered the truth that he already had a wife, who came forward to reveal herself as his spouse. The man tried to leave her to be with the head nurse’s niece, hoping to gain wealth from her. The head nurse told her niece about this man and his wife, but the niece did not believe it. She insisted that the man truly loved her and argued that the other woman was trying to keep her boyfriend, but the man no longer loved and had left that woman. The situation seemed complicated.
The head nurse said, “I have raised this niece since she was little, always taking care of her. I love her very much and taught her everything, especially about relationships with men. It’s disappointing that she got pregnant and misjudged people, being deceived and not believing her aunt. It’s truly heartbreaking.” The head nurse’s face showed stress, reflecting her disappointment and frustration.
She continued, “Regarding my niece’s pregnancy, our family, including my niece, discussed it and agreed that continuing the pregnancy was not possible. Before meeting with you, I explained the pros and cons, future necessities, and spoke with the man, agreeing not to continue the pregnancy. Initially, my niece struggled to accept it, thinking for a long time, but eventually agreed to terminate the pregnancy, crying all the time, needing constant comfort, which exhausted me.” The nurse requested, “Professor, I would like the staff not to emphasize why an abortion is necessary and not to let my niece see what is aborted. She would be very upset and unable to handle it because she is not strong enough. I beg you…”
After the doctor promised to take good care, the nurse opened up, saying,
“Doctor, what I experienced with my niece’s pregnancy made me think about how I care for patients who come to us. I used to not believe their stories and often blamed them for not knowing how to prevent and control birth, usually asking them to continue the pregnancy and raise the child…”
“But when such a situation happened to me, I understood those with unplanned pregnancies, realizing how necessary it is for them to tell their stories and plead with doctors and nurses to terminate the pregnancy. I began to understand the difficulties women face when they cannot continue a pregnancy. It’s truly challenging to explain and justify things to make doctors and nurses believe, sympathize, understand, and agree to help terminate the pregnancy…
The nurse concluded with an interesting note, “From now on, I will organize a counseling service for unplanned pregnancies at the hospital I oversee. I will consult with the hospital director. We have 16 nurses who can help each other to provide friendly counseling to patients.” I acknowledged and understood the words that poured out.
What happened is that she, in real life…
has changed her attitude towards unplanned pregnancies from her own experience…
With love and care,
Dr. Ruangkit Sirikanchanakul