The phenomenon of unplanned pregnancy and the choice to terminate a pregnancy are issues that those who face the situation or have prior experience choose not to discuss or disclose to the public. Thasnai Khantayaporn mentioned the tendency of people not to talk about this experience as follows:
“This is a matter that is not talked about… resulting in people having fewer opportunities to seek knowledge on the subject. Therefore, (those who have never faced the situation) speak from their own limitations, from what they have perceived… One framework is the legal framework. As mentioned, if people do not truly understand the law, they will think that everything about this matter is wrong… Women who face this problem do not come forward to speak because it is a matter that has passed. Once it is over, they want it to be over, over without anyone knowing…
So, there is no continuous discussion… Those who face the problem themselves do not want to make it a public issue either, so they do not open the opportunity for others to learn about the lives of those who have experienced it. This is different from AIDS (where those infected have presented or shared their experiences for others in society to know)” *(Thasnai Khantayaporn, interview, December 15, 2009)
This observation reflects the difficult situation of women facing the situation. The unpreparedness of pregnancy stems from the violation of sexual norms, and the choice not to continue the pregnancy conflicts with the definition of womanhood as a mother who sacrifices everything in life for this role.
This makes the situation and the choice seen as a grave wrongdoing accompanied by the stigma of fear of being judged or viewed negatively, and causing disappointment to those important in their lives, leading women to choose not to discuss the situation with others, even those close to them.
Unplanned pregnancy and abortion are situations that can be hidden because if not disclosed, others will not know that a woman is facing this situation. Many women choose to remain silent rather than openly discuss their difficulties or experiences.
This condition causes many women to face the situation alone, unable to access counseling and services, and at risk of unsafe abortion methods to prevent others from knowing about their unplanned pregnancy. Concealment to avoid stigma leads people in society, both those who have and have not faced the situation, to understand that terminating a pregnancy is abnormal, occurs infrequently, and is an issue of a small number of bad women**(Adam, “Bad Mother,” 184.)
The distorted image of choosing abortion as part of life or managing women’s reproduction in many societies leads to debates about rules and policies related to abortion being based on misunderstandings and not aligning with the life situations of many groups of women.
Source: Debating Abortion: Health, Freedom, Morality, pages 212-214 by Professor Chalidaporn Songsamphan
Whether to continue the pregnancy or terminate it, women have the right to decide their own life path and access services that align with their choices. As members of society, we can help by being open-minded, understanding, and not judging or stigmatizing anyone’s unpreparedness…